Each day, we are faced with consequences at every turn. They can be good consequences when we turn in an assignment that has been researched and prepared to the best of our ability; or they can be negative consequences when we choose not to show up to our job. It’s our choice, we have the power to make the right choice or the wrong choice. We can take the easy way and pay later; or work a little harder and reap the long term benefits.
Prepare, advise, then let them learn naturally, in a safe environment (physically and emotionally).
The same goes for our youth. Allowing them some leniency in their choices means they experience what happens when they choose differently than you would, whether that is a bad or good thing. These small choices help them improve and gain self-confidence while learning about natural consequences. It is important to allow these consequences to be the teacher, putting you in a position of advice giver rather than punisher or rescuer. A youth who walks out into the rain without a jacket will be wet and uncomfortable. They naturally learn a lesson. If you grab them a jacket or punish them for not doing so, you take away that natural consequences and impact your position (love, respect, appreciating your guidance) with your youth. As long as they are not in danger, allow youth to learn from these natural consequences and discuss (to their level) the outcome and how it effects them now and in the long run.
Challenge: Allow a little thing to go, such as the wrong shoes or jacket and see how your child reacts to natural consequences.
