Youth Odyssey Program Facilitator Brian, had the opportunity to attend an eight week Practical Skills for Parenting in Today’s World seminar. The tips and topics under discussion are applicable to parents, guardians, family members, and all adults working with youth. Below are three that particularly resonated with us.
Anyone who’s worked with a youth can empathize with how difficult they are to communicate with, but the question is, how well are we listening?
Active listening challenges the listener to get inside the head of the speaker and understand the whole message they are communicating, both verbal and non verbal.
Challenge: Actively listen in at least one conversation this week. Don’t think of your response while the speaker is talking, make eye contact, repeat back the message, and pick up on non verbal clues.
Source: Conflict Research Consortium, University of Colorado, USA
As anyone who works with youth knows, we spend the majority of our time giving. We give our time, resources, and energy to the youth we love, but the truth is, you can’t give something you don’t have. When was the last time you took an honest assessment of your mental, physical, and emotional state?
Understanding and meeting your own need for acceptance, praise, and encouragement makes you more capable of taking care of those who need you.
Challenge: This week, take at least thirty minutes to do something for yourself, whether that’s coffee with a friend or enjoying some time outdoors, and note how it impacts the rest of your day.
Source: The Counseling Corner, American Counseling Association
We’ve all done it, we’re in a rush and they’re taking too long to tie their shoes so we do it for them or they’ve lost their favorite toy so we buy them a new one. As adults, these activities seem simple and unimportant, taking charge streamlines the process and makes the day smoother. The truth is, this type of “enabling” also has a profound, long term impact on youth.
Enabling can be defined as getting between youth and life experiences to minimize the consequences of their choices. We seek to protect youth from the harsher realities of life, but we also protect them from understanding cause and effect.
Empowering is turning over control to youth so they have power over their own lives. This means knowing your youth’s limits, and allowing them to make decisions within those limits. Doing this shows youth you have faith in them, and that making a mistake isn’t the end of the world.
Challenge: Spend some time this week noticing how you enable and empower the youth around you.
Source: Teaching Parenting the Positive Discipline Way by Lynn Lott and Jane Nelsen
